Growing

I am finding that as time goes on the D/s lifestyle is becoming easier and less foreign in bug and I's life. I feel like it is becoming familiar and accepted, as opposed to a template I am trying to adapt to an already set standard. Every week I gain new experience both in the D/s world and in life. This transition is just as busy as I thought it would be, between a new job, filling a house, planning a wedding, and training a sub...soon to add being a father to that list. But just like I tell bug, you can't grow without pushing your limits. Without some sort of plan to find limits, and push them, making progress in anything (but especially D/s) is difficult if not impossible. It is my job to guide us and make us grow and so I have began planting the seeds, making things happen as a Dom should.

I had bug begin her training again. She has recovered nicely from our scare last week and has been in an excellent mood all week (by excellent I mean horny, of course). Our ultimate goal was to train her to be able to squirt (female ejaculation). After quite a bit of research I found that most women can if they practice and train (whereas some lack the anatomy for whatever reason). So I set out with a plan, have her practice "releasing" and strengthening her PC muscle.

As I figure out more about myself I find that humiliation is highly erotic to me. So I gave bug a task, one that I most certainly would have never asked her had we never have been in a D/s relationship. I asked her to kneel down and piss herself in front of me. I said if you can release yourself there, you will have an easier time when you practice female ejaculation. So I made the necessary preparations and she did, moaning as she did. I was surprised that A.) she did it with less hesitation than I thought, and B.) that she found it erotic enough to moan, of her own accord mind you. After that I proceeded to train her ass with her butt plug training kit, making it all the way to medium without flinching. Our sex afterwards was electric! She begged for cum like a champ (And for a reason that will be in my next post). Afterwards I began fingering her, stroking her G-spot as I had learned. It became more and more intense until, much to my surprise, she squirted! It wasn't a huge gushing stream, but enough to push past my hand and wet a lot of my bed. It was clear, and slightly slick, not darker and watery like pee. She had actually managed to ejaculate.

Along with these physical things she is growing into a fine sub, just as I am becoming more confident and comfortable in my Dominance. I feel like this is a turning point in our D/s relationship, not because of the physical aspects but because the emotional side mirrors the physical changes. She is more affectionate, feminine, and willing to please than I have ever seen. I am very proud of my bug!

My question for my readers is this: Do you remember the point where D/s began to feel more natural and less foreign? What was it that made your role finally sink in (Dom or sub)? What are some of your limits that you or your partner has pushed with good results?

From bug and I!

Today I gave bug a writing assignment, as I do every weekday. I asked her to write what submission meant to her. What does she get from it? How did it make her feel? And what she was thankful for in our D/s relationship. I thought since I usually do most of the talking I would share some of her thoughts, along with my own. Here is her response:

"What does submission mean to me? Ultimately just feeling close, controlled and admired and that is a wonderful thing.

What am I thankful for in the D/s relationship?

"I will first start about just the relationship I have with my dominant in general, and how I am so thankful that I was able to find someone who I can relate with on such a deep level, that is kind, caring, romantic and most of all faithful to me. I cannot stress how much of a relief that is to be with someone who only has eyes for you after having been cheated on by others in the past. I am thankful that I am given the opportunity to please someone so greatly and see the affects that is has on him, because I love to see him smile and be happy. I am thankful to have direction and control on my life, as I had a hard time bringing those aspects to my life by myself. I am thankful to have such an intimate relationship on all levels, even if I can't always say why. I am just thankful to be loved and to love such a handsome, wonderful person."


It really meant alot to me, hearing how she felt and everything, so I decided to answer my own assignment as well. My post for today will be about the same thing:

I am thankful for her gift of submission. I feel like since we have adapted this lifestyle we have fought less, she is far happier, far more confident, and has alot more self esteem. Granted, she still has a long way to go from the self conscious, nervous wreck she used to be ;) I have seen a change in her for the better, and thats what means most to me. The constant sex, and control is excellent, but watching her grow into my perfect wife and women means more than I think even she knows. Being Dominant to me isnt about whips and chains and punishments 24-7, its a reverence for each other, a mutual respect and drive to make each other happy. As a submissive she gives me anything I ask of her along with her trust, and in return I take care of her every need. It works for us. We balance each other, know each other, and could not bear being parted. I feel like we are growing into the people we set out to be when we adopted this lifestyle. We still have a long way to go but I am honored to guide her down that path.

Domination Tactics?

Hello, readers! I'm back in action and fully recovered! I have alot of good news! My job is going well and I fit in great. Bug has been doing absolutely excellent in her submissive training the past 2 weeks. Our wedding is just about 85% planned and set in stone, and the house is coming along nicely. I cannot believe it is only a month away. I am so excited to get into my own place, and be my own person. It is demoralizing living at home and being still looked at like a "child." But I hear parents never really see their children as anything but just that, children!

Anyway, I have been doing alot of research and planning when it comes to my role in bug and I's D/s relationship. This lifestyle tends to be fairly one-sided when it comes to the concept of "training." Dom's need training too! Especially being so inexperienced and young, as in my case. We just have to teach ourselves, a skill that I luckily posess, and as well as have the discipline to see it through. Over the past month I have started taking a look at what -can- I do to enforce my rules? To make her feel controled? To guide her? Literally, "WHAT CAN I DO?"

And so I devised a list of daily activities, both sexual and nonsexual that I have gathered from several different sites that would reinforce the concept of ownership and control. I have been really light on bug when it comes to spankings and reprimanding her attitude, mostly because I never know if it is her talking, or the pregnancy hormones. And they make her literally a different person at times. Once we move in together I plan on stepping up her training, and expect her to step up her efforts because she will be more comfortable in "our" house than in "hers" or "mine" currently. Privacy is always an issue these days.

However, my question for all my lurkers and followers (Dom and sub alike) is this: What makes you feel most in control/controlled? What are some everyday things you do to keep the "feeling" going? Sexually? Non sexually? I'd love to hear from you!

Her training is coming along well!

A short post for today! But I wanted to share how well Bug has been doing with her training. After a little coaching she can give an amazing, and diverse blowjob, and enthusiastically too! Her anal training has progressed nicely. She can now take all 10 of her anal beads without flinching, and has finally given up worrying about "what if it gets dirty....?" We are expecting a package in the mail today with the rest of her training supplies -evil grin- I am going to have some fun with those! An Anal Training kit! 3 plugs and a dildo to get her used to it. Soon I will be taking her ass as freely as I do her pussy :D

Also, I think paying her bills yesterday helped reaffirm my commitment to this lifestyle. She seemed less stressed and happier: my number 1 goal!

Week of July 4th!

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.